Leading When Life Needs More of You: Good Leadership Can Look Different for a While

Leadership doesn't stop when life gets hard — but your expectations of yourself may need to change. Leading when life needs more of you isn't about fitting everything in. It's about being deliberate about what you hold onto, what you let go of, and what you let others carry for a while.

The 'sandwich generation' is changing how leaders work

In conversations with leaders lately, I've noticed how many are juggling work around ageing parents. A parent has become seriously unwell. Someone has had an accident. Others are taking time away from work because a parent has died.

For many of us, this is becoming a new part of our working lives — supporting ageing parents, often while still supporting our own families, alongside the demands of work and leadership. There's a reason they call it the "sandwich generation". And it raises something we don't talk about very often: how do you lead when life needs more of you?

Good leadership can look different for a while

Leadership doesn't stop when life gets hard. But perhaps our expectations of ourselves need to change. There will be times when you can't bring the same energy, attention or capacity you normally would. That doesn't mean you've stopped being a good leader. It means recognising that good leadership can look different for a while.

• Being realistic about what you have capacity for.

• Being clear with your team about what they can expect from you.

• Deciding what genuinely needs you and what doesn't.

• Letting other people step in, make decisions and lead.

Leading when life needs more of you is about being deliberate

Leading when life needs more of you isn't about finding a way to fit everything in. It's about being deliberate about what you hold onto, what you let go of, and what you let others carry for a while. So rather than trying to work out how to keep doing everything you normally do, perhaps the better question is: what does my leadership need to look like right now?

When it's someone on your team

There's another side to this. At some point, it may not be you — it may be someone you're leading. The same care applies: making space, being clear about what they can expect from you, helping decide what genuinely needs them right now, and letting the team carry what it can for a while.

Worth noticing this week

So here's this week's thought starter.

• If life is asking more of you right now, what could you give yourself permission to do differently?

• What does your leadership need to look like right now — and what could you let others carry?

• And if it's someone in your team, what might they need from you?

Frequently asked questions

How do you lead when life gets hard?

By adjusting your expectations of yourself rather than trying to do everything as normal. Be realistic about your capacity, clear with your team about what they can expect, deliberate about what genuinely needs you, and willing to let others step in and lead for a while.

What is the 'sandwich generation'?

It describes people caring for ageing parents while still supporting their own families, alongside the demands of work. For many leaders, it's becoming a regular part of working life.

How can I support someone on my team who is going through a hard time?

Give them space and reduce the pressure where you can. Be clear about what they can expect from you, help decide what genuinely needs them right now, and let the team carry more for a while. Small, practical adjustments often matter more than grand gestures.

Leadership is a practice, not a position — and it holds, even when life asks more of you. Sometimes the most human thing a leader does is let good leadership look different for a while.